Friday, May 20, 2011

More Questions, Part Two of Nine Thousand

The only thing better than a five-year-old asking endless questions, is a two-year-old joining in. Here are just a few of my philosophical conversations with my daughters.

"Daddy, why is Kool-Aid purple?" IR asked me over a lunch of macaroni and cheese.
"Well, grape Kool-Aid is purple, not all of it is. But it is purple because they make it purple with dye, just like you did with snow at school that one time."
"Who makes it purple?"
"The people who make it, honey."
"Why do they make it purple?"
"That is a good question. I guess because some grapes are purple so they want it to look like that."
"What is my color?" ML asked, sticking out her tongue.
"What do you mean?" I returned.
"What is my color?!"
"I don't know what you are talking about." I snapped. She opened her mouth again and I realized the meaning of the question. "Your tongue is purple sweetie."

New parent warning: If your child happens to have bright green poop, don't panic, it is a result of drinking grape Kool-Aid. Berry Blue Kool-Aid results in electric blue poop. Yes, I am the father of the year for continuing to give Kool-Aid to my kids in light of this discovery.

On other days I get questions like this:
"What is that?" asks IR.
"That is a rhinoceros."
"Why is it a rhinoceros?" She persists.
"Um, because that's what it is honey."
"Because isn't an answer Daddy."
"Yes, I know. It is a rhinoceros because that is what the people who name things decided it was going to be called."
"Why is it gray?"
"Because it lives around gray stuff and it makes it harder for it to be seen."
"What was that joke you were telling me yesterday?"
"Why did the chicken cross the kitchen?"
"So he could poop on a plate." Then they both giggle.
"Why did the chichen cross the kicken?" ML blurts.

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